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  1. #1
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Miscellaneous/Funny Pictures (moved from Coffee Lounge)

    I'll post some funny pictures here, hope more of you follow suit.









    And some neat optical illusions:





    Last edited by Kevin Bonham; 09-08-2005 at 02:40 AM. Reason: at request.
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  2. #2
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    And some more...
    Attached Images Attached Images
    Last edited by Alan Shore; 10-02-2006 at 02:47 PM.
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  3. #3
    CC resident nutcase Trent Parker's Avatar
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    I have some funny cityrail announcements if anyone wants them. Pm me i'll email them to you.
    GO THE DRAGONS!
    GO Western Sydney Wanderers!
    Quote Originally Posted by Adamski's signature
    God exists. Short and to the point.
    This is the reason I do not wade into religion threads.

  4. #4
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by the chess nut
    I have some funny cityrail announcements if anyone wants them. Pm me i'll email them to you.
    Feel free to email them to me Trent.

    Here's some more:




    And some bad jobs to have:
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    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  5. #5
    CC International Master
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    send me the cityrail announcenents too!

  6. #6
    CC International Master
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    [QUOTE=Bruce Dickinson]




    [\QUOTE]

    You are an education student, aren't you, Bruce?

  7. #7
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by garethbcharles
    You are an education student, aren't you, Bruce?
    Not quite, degrees are in Psychology and Philosophy/Religion.

    However, I do teach chess to primary school students.. so you're half correct
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  8. #8
    CC resident nutcase Trent Parker's Avatar
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    Damn. I cant upload these files to yahoo....

    Anyhow funny cityrail announcements can be found on another forum i visit

    Railpage Australia
    http://www.railpage.com.au/f-t15313-s0.htm
    GO THE DRAGONS!
    GO Western Sydney Wanderers!
    Quote Originally Posted by Adamski's signature
    God exists. Short and to the point.
    This is the reason I do not wade into religion threads.

  9. #9
    CC resident nutcase Trent Parker's Avatar
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    Scroll down on the above site to get "orange mountain". It's the best.
    GO THE DRAGONS!
    GO Western Sydney Wanderers!
    Quote Originally Posted by Adamski's signature
    God exists. Short and to the point.
    This is the reason I do not wade into religion threads.

  10. #10
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Found a winning animated .gif but I'll save it for page 2 to be kind to those with dial-up connections.

    Instead:
    Attached Images Attached Images
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  11. #11
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    This isn't a picture but it's very funny


    THE COLLEGE THEME PAPER: HE VS. SHE

    Remember the book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus"?
    Well, here's a prime example offered by an English professor at an
    American University.

    "Today we will experiment with a new form of composition called the
    tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
    person sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will then
    write the first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the
    first paragraph and then add another paragraph to the story. The
    first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back and forth.

    Remember to reread what has been written each time in order to keep the
    story coherent. There is to be absolutely NO talking and anything you wish
    to say must be written on the paper. The story is over when both agree a
    conclusion has been reached."

    The following was actually turned in by two of my English students:
    Rebecca -last name deleted, and Gary - last name deleted.
    -------------------------------------------------------------
    STORY:

    (first paragraph by Rebecca)

    At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The
    camomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now
    reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he
    liked camomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind
    off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about
    him too much her asthma started acting up again. So camomile was out of
    the question.
    ------------------------------------------------------

    (second paragraph by Gary)

    Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron
    now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about
    than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with
    whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to
    Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator "Polar
    orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could
    sign off, a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a
    hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
    him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Rebecca)

    He bumped his head and died almost immediately but not before he felt
    one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who
    had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its
    pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4.
    "Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel,"
    Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously
    excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her
    youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with no
    newspapers to read, no television to distract her from her sense of
    innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one
    lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully.
    ---------------------------------------------------------
    (Gary)

    Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.
    Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the
    first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy peaceniks who
    pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through the congress
    had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were
    determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage
    of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough
    firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they
    swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile
    entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret Mobile
    submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
    inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid, Laurie and
    85 million other Americans. The President slammed his fist on the conference
    table. "We can't allow this! I'm going to veto that treaty! Let's blow 'em
    out of the sky!"

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Rebecca)

    This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My
    writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semi-literate adolescent.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Gary)

    Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at
    writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh shall I have
    camomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F***ING TEA??? Oh no, I'm
    an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels."

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Rebecca)

    Asshole.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Gary)

    Bitch.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Rebecca)

    Wanker.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Gary)

    Slut.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Rebecca)

    Get f****d.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    (Gary)

    Eat s**t.

    --------------------------------------------------------

    (Rebecca)

    F*** YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!

    ---------------------------------------------------------

    (Gary)

    Go drink some tea - whore.


    ************************************************** ********

    (Teacher)

    A+ - I really liked this one.
    Last edited by Alan Shore; 16-02-2005 at 03:43 AM. Reason: Fix spacing
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  12. #12
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    A spy...
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    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  13. #13
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Aussie construction sign:
    Attached Images Attached Images
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  14. #14
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Now we're on page 2.. the 'winner' .gif:

    (unfortunately it's very large... can only link to it... you might want to go make a cup of coffee and come back to watch, hehe).

    http://img14.paintedover.com/uploads/14/elevator.gif

    Edit: Too big to link to if there's going to be more images on this page.. just left the weblink itself.
    Last edited by Alan Shore; 16-02-2005 at 04:11 AM.
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  15. #15
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Wow, this is so true for me.... how many times have I had this condundrum..!

    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

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