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  1. #1
    Account Shoutbox Banned antichrist's Avatar
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    Beer Better Than Jesus

    Top Ten Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Jesus
    10.
    No one will kill you for not drinking beer.
    9.
    Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.
    8.
    Beer has never caused a major war.
    7.
    They don't force beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
    6.
    When you have beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
    5.
    Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured to death over his brand of beer.
    4.
    You don't have to wait 2,000+ years for a second beer.
    3.
    There are laws saying that beer labels can't lie to you.
    2.
    You can prove you have a beer.
    1.
    If you have devoted your life to beer, there are groups to help you stop.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------ --------
    List created by Stephen P. Berry.
    (c) Copyright 1995 by The Agnostic & Atheist Student Group



    ------------------------------------------------------------------------ --------
    aasg@atheist.tamu.edu

  2. #2
    Reader in Slood Dynamics Rincewind's Avatar
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    Top Ten Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Jesus
    10.
    No one will kill you for not drinking beer.
    You haven't been to a BBQ at my place

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    9.
    Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.
    No, but drink too much and it can pretty much ensure celebacy.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    8.
    Beer has never caused a major war.
    No, but some major bruhahas!

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    7.
    They don't force beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
    See point 10 above.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    6.
    When you have beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
    No, but if you run out you might go door knocking to look for more beer.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    5.
    Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured to death over his brand of beer.
    Refering to point 10 (above) I have burnt a few people's steaks because they drank the wrong brand of beer. (Damn you 4X drinkers)

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    4.
    You don't have to wait 2,000+ years for a second beer.
    You do, if you're waiting for certain people to shout!

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    3.
    There are laws saying that beer labels can't lie to you.
    Yes, but no one drinks beer because of what's written on the label.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    2.
    You can prove you have a beer.
    No, but as all kowledge is perceived through the senses there is no a priori knowledge, per se. With what beer does to sensory perception this is probably a good thing.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    1.
    If you have devoted your life to beer, there are groups to help you stop.
    AAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

    (Jumps out of window).
    So einfach wie möglich, aber nicht einfacher - Albert Einstein

  3. #3
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    Top Ten Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Jesus
    This has got to be one of the most stupidest, vile and provacative thread ever introduced. Why do you post such anti christian garbage? :x

    Fine, if you dont like Jesus, but then why go out and actively attack all those who are christians? :x
    Always do your Best

  4. #4
    Account Shoutbox Banned antichrist's Avatar
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.[/quote]

    No, but drink too much and it can pretty much ensure celebacy.
    ______________________________

    Remember in Don's Party it stopped Graham Kennedy at the crucial moment.
    __________________________

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    8.
    Beer has never caused a major war.
    No, but some major bruhahas!

    A thousand years ago the Russian rulers were supposed to lead their kingdoms to Christianity because of their mobs love of a beer, in comparison to the Muslims the teetotallers.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    6.
    When you have beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
    But you might chunder it away
    _______________________________________-

  5. #5
    Account Shoutbox Banned antichrist's Avatar
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Quote Originally Posted by chesslover
    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    Top Ten Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Jesus
    This has got to be one of the most stupidest, vile and provacative thread ever introduced. Why do you post such anti christian garbage? :x

    Fine, if you dont like Jesus, but then why go out and actively attack all those who are christians? :x
    Keating was wrong, souffle does rise twice

  6. #6
    Reader in Slood Dynamics Rincewind's Avatar
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    Remember in Don's Party it stopped Graham Kennedy at the crucial moment.
    Yes, this was noted much earlier though. Shakespeare in Macbeth (II, iii), for example...

    Macduff: What three things does drink especially provoke?
    Porter: Marry, sir, nose-painting, sleep and urine. Lechery, sir, it provokes, and unprovokes; it provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance.

    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    A thousand years ago the Russian rulers were supposed to lead their kingdoms to Christianity because of their mobs love of a beer, in comparison to the Muslims the teetotallers.
    Tradition says that is so. Prince Vladimir in 985 is reputed to be taken with the Islamic religion but not keen on the ban on drinking and so leant towards Christianity. The Wedding at Caana might have been his favorite story. I know it is one of mine. I mean he took water and turned it into wine. That is so cool. Jesus is way cool.
    So einfach wie möglich, aber nicht einfacher - Albert Einstein

  7. #7
    Reader in Slood Dynamics Rincewind's Avatar
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Quote Originally Posted by chesslover
    This has got to be one of the most stupidest, vile and provacative thread ever introduced. Why do you post such anti christian garbage? :x
    Love the Life you Live
    Live the Life you Love

    Quote Originally Posted by chesslover
    Fine, if you dont like Jesus, but then why go out and actively attack all those who are christians? :x
    If not now, WHEN?
    So einfach wie möglich, aber nicht einfacher - Albert Einstein

  8. #8
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    Re: Beer Better Than Jesus

    Quote Originally Posted by Barry Cox
    Quote Originally Posted by chesslover
    This has got to be one of the most stupidest, vile and provacative thread ever introduced. Why do you post such anti christian garbage? :x
    Love the Life you Live
    Live the Life you Love

    Quote Originally Posted by chesslover
    Fine, if you dont like Jesus, but then why go out and actively attack all those who are christians? :x
    If not now, WHEN?
    stop being a smart alec, and do not encourage anti-christ :x

  9. #9
    CC International Master Goughfather's Avatar
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    Chesslover,

    Your post raises an interesting question about free speech. We all acknowledge that free speech is a value which should be encouraged, but where should we draw the line. I think you would agree that legitimately expressed criticism is vital in a democracy, and this criticism may take the form of cutting satire. The real question to be asked is where the mere criticism of one's beliefs/position becomes abuse. The dividing line can often be obscured with shades of grey. However, wherever this line is, I believe that this is a line that must not be crossed.

    Ironically, as I'm sure you would have experienced, if we, as Christians were to make comments of a similar manner to those of "anti-Christ" regarding those who hold an atheistic faith, or any other religious tradition, we would be quite rightly regarded as being intolerant. Sadly, however, such double standards seem to abound. There is little that we can do about this, but to accept such comments graciously with a grain of salt. I've been reading the sermons of Martin Luther King lately, and he makes the poignant point that we ought to love our enemies because "violence begets violence, and hate begets hate". He continues on to say that "love has within it a redemptive power. And there is a power that eventually transforms individuals."

    You may not agree with or like what "anti-Christ" says. But remember that the real test of character will not in your response towards those who speak favourably of and towards you, but in your response towards those who attitude is often snide, condescending and arrogant towards you. Accept it as a challenge, and I can assure you - you will reap the rewards of your graceful attitude.

    Kind Regards,

    Goughfather (the artist formerly known as "Machiavelli")
    "People with guns don't understand. That's why they get guns. Too many misunderstandings." - Jerry Seinfeld, The Little Kicks

  10. #10
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    Some good points. Nice post Goughfather.

  11. #11
    Reader in Slood Dynamics Rincewind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goughfather
    Ironically, as I'm sure you would have experienced, if we, as Christians were to make comments of a similar manner to those of "anti-Christ" regarding those who hold an atheistic faith, or any other religious tradition, we would be quite rightly regarded as being intolerant. Sadly, however, such double standards seem to abound. There is little that we can do about this, but to accept such comments graciously with a grain of salt. I've been reading the sermons of Martin Luther King lately, and he makes the poignant point that we ought to love our enemies because "violence begets violence, and hate begets hate". He continues on to say that "love has within it a redemptive power. And there is a power that eventually transforms individuals."
    I don't have a problem laughing at atheism. I suppose denial of a "grand scheme" lends one a certain flippancy. So do your worse, I can pretty much assure you I won't be offended. But please make it funny.
    So einfach wie möglich, aber nicht einfacher - Albert Einstein

  12. #12
    Monster of the deep Kevin Bonham's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goughfather
    The real question to be asked is where the mere criticism of one's beliefs/position becomes abuse. The dividing line can often be obscured with shades of grey. However, wherever this line is, I believe that this is a line that must not be crossed.
    Are you sure that there is nothing in the Bible that could possibly be considered "abuse" towards people who do not share the views in question?

    I'd be interested to see your reasons for why the line should be there (the reasons in turn can be used to attempt to draw the line.) I find this issue tricky and I tend to be sceptical of arguments offered for drawing it at all, at least any further out than very obvious matters like "incitement to riot".

    Ironically, as I'm sure you would have experienced, if we, as Christians were to make comments of a similar manner to those of "anti-Christ" regarding those who hold an atheistic faith, or any other religious tradition, we would be quite rightly regarded as being intolerant.
    Depends on how "intolerant" is used. I'm a big fan of the more traditional definition stemming from "to tolerate" meaning "to allow to exist without forceful interference", meaning that you could dislike someone or their beliefs, and say pretty much whatever you liked about them, so long as you didn't actually use the force of law (or other violence) against them.

    The growing use of "tolerate" meaning something like "respect" is a real shame in my view - has clouded the meaning of what was one of the most useful words in our political vocab and led to the use of "intolerant" as a shabby all-purpose political insult.

    I frequently find Christians accusing atheists of being hypocritically "intolerant" for harshly worded criticisms of their religion. This is amusing because many of the atheists criticised are only "intolerant" in the second sense (disrespectful) whereas many portions of Christianity have historically been intolerant in both senses, and some of the fundamentalist strands could be expected to be very intolerant in the first sense if they reached a position where they were able to do so. Perhaps not towards other beliefs per se - but through moral law towards actions forbidden in fundamentalist interpretations.

  13. #13
    Account Permanently Banned PHAT's Avatar
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    Sex Vs JC

    Top Ten Reasons Why Sex Is Better Than Jesus
    10.
    No one will kill you to have sex with you.
    9.
    Sex dosen't stop you from going to heaven - you are already there.
    8.
    People would rather have sex than make holy war.
    7.
    Schools (non-religious) don't force children to have sex.
    6.
    When you have sex, you don't knock on people's doors to tell everyone why you smell like you do.
    5.
    Councils will not allow brothels to be set up close to schools or public places.
    4.
    You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second coming - you can bring it on whenever you want.
    3.
    There are laws that say you cannot have sex in public.
    2.
    Syphyilis, gonhorrea and crabs is proof of sex.
    1.
    If you have devoted your life to sex, you will have more friends and relatives.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------ --------
    Original "beer better than JC" list created by Stephen P. Berry
    The Agnostic & Atheist Student Group

  14. #14
    Account Shoutbox Banned antichrist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Matthew Sweeney
    Top Ten Reasons Why Sex Is Better Than Jesus
    10.
    No one will kill you to have sex with you.
    9.
    Sex dosen't stop you from going to heaven - you are already there.
    8.
    People would rather have sex than make holy war.
    7.
    Schools (non-religious) don't force children to have sex.
    6.
    When you have sex, you don't knock on people's doors to tell everyone why you smell like you do.
    5.
    Councils will not allow brothels to be set up close to schools or public places.
    4.
    You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second coming - you can bring it on whenever you want.
    3.
    There are laws that say you cannot have sex in public.
    2.
    Syphyilis, gonhorrea and crabs is proof of sex.
    1.
    If you have devoted your life to sex, you will have more friends and relatives.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------ --------
    Original "beer better than JC" list created by Stephen P. Berry
    The Agnostic & Atheist Student Group
    Matthew
    Tighten it up a little and send to original group, they may post it and you become famous.

  15. #15
    CC Grandmaster arosar's Avatar
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    Did any of you blokes watch that show on SBS re the Bible? Interesting, wasn't it? Makes you wonder what it is we've been believing all this time.

    AR

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