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  1. #1
    CC Grandmaster Alan Shore's Avatar
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    Chess Quotes

    Funny we don't have a thread for these:

    'And the most important superiority, the most total one, is the superiority of the mind. I mean, your opponent must be destroyed. Fully destroyed.'
    - Garry Kasparov

    "Chess is so inspiring that I do not believe a good player is capable of having an evil thought during the game." - Wilhelm Steinitz

    "On the chessboard, if nowhere else, justice does triumph." - Irving Chernev

    "The profuse phallic symbolism of chess provides some fantasy gratification of the homosexual wish, particularly the desire for mutual masturbation." - Reuben Fine, The Psychology of the Chess Player, 1956

    "Checkers is for tramps." - Paul Morphy

    "A computer beat me in chess, but it was no match when it came to kickboxing" - Signature of an anonymous message board user.


    And my favourite:

    "The passion for playing chess is one of the most unaccountable in the world. It slaps the theory of natural selection in the face. It is the most absorbing of occupations. The least satisfying of desires. A nameless excrescence upon life. It annihilates a man. You have, let us say, a promising politician, a rising artist that you wish to destroy. Dagger or bomb are archaic and unreliable - but teach him, inoculate him with chess." H.G. Wells, Certain Personal Matters, 1898
    "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
    - White Queen, Alice through the Looking-Glass

  2. #2
    Reader in Slood Dynamics Rincewind's Avatar
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    Chess is a game. Chess is a battle. Chess is war. It is art, science, logic, and beauty. Chess is the ultimate contest between two minds. Chess is the mental torture of one's opponent, and the mental torture of oneself. Chess is drama. It is tragedy. It is tears and frustration. Chess is despair. Chess is laughter, joy, and triumph. Chess is a friendship formed through a contest. Chess is 16 pieces, 32 men, 64 squares. It is openings and endgames, tactics and strategy. Chess is combinations. Chess is planning. Chess is the sharpening of the mind, the exercise of the brain. Chess is thinking. Chess is pure thought. Chess is tension, toil, and strife. Chess is losing. Chess is winning. Chess is beating and being beaten. Chess is where all excuses fail. Chess is a hobby, a mania, a fixation. Chess is an addiction. Chess is a waste of time. Chess is a distraction. Chess is passion. Chess is truth. Chess is life. – Daniel White
    So einfach wie möglich, aber nicht einfacher - Albert Einstein

  3. #3
    CC Candidate Master
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    One of the funniest scenes I have ever in a chess tournament was in the Fairfield Winter Cup of 2005. The DOP, Charles Zworestine, was announcing the mobile phone rule before one of the rounds when he asked the audience if they had any questions. Johny Bolens put up his hand and then proceeded to complain, amazingly, about how he was unhappy that the arbiter had constantly announced the mobile-phone rule (in previous tournaments). Anyone who has met Bolens will have an idea what a character he is, and what a funny scene this would have been. The entire playing hall was listening to what he had to say and found it very amusing. His comments went on for quite some time, so it is hard to quote exactly what he said, but I definitely remember the following passage correctly:

    "Everytime you mention this mobile phone rule! I don't care if people talk on their mobile phone! Mobile phone people can talk as much as they like!" - Johny Bolens

  4. #4
    CC Grandmaster antichrist's Avatar
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    H.G. Wells: Chess is a brilliant waste of time
    Steinitz: Not even God can give me a queen start
    A/C: You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you just may find that you get what you need.

  5. #5
    Reader in Slood Dynamics Rincewind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    A/C: You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you just may find that you get what you need.
    Hey, that was Mick Jagger! Although many accused him of being the A/C.
    So einfach wie möglich, aber nicht einfacher - Albert Einstein

  6. #6
    CC Grandmaster antichrist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rincewind
    Hey, that was Mick Jagger! Although many accused him of being the A/C.
    I do have an original but fortunately cannot remember it. But the above does have truth?

  7. #7
    CC Candidate Master
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    Quote Originally Posted by 1min_grandmaster
    One of the funniest scenes I have ever in a chess tournament was in the Fairfield Winter Cup of 2005. The DOP, Charles Zworestine, was announcing the mobile phone rule before one of the rounds when he asked the audience if they had any questions. Johny Bolens put up his hand and then proceeded to complain, amazingly, about how he was unhappy that the arbiter had constantly announced the mobile-phone rule (in previous tournaments). Anyone who has met Bolens will have an idea what a character he is, and what a funny scene this would have been. The entire playing hall was listening to what he had to say and found it very amusing. His comments went on for quite some time, so it is hard to quote exactly what he said, but I definitely remember the following passage correctly:

    "Everytime you mention this mobile phone rule! I don't care if people talk on their mobile phone! Mobile phone people can talk as much as they like!" - Johny Bolens
    LOL, i heard that one!
    Never underestimate junior chess players

  8. #8
    CC Grandmaster Spiny Norman's Avatar
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    Bobby Fischer's best

    I like the moment when I break a man’s ego.
    - Bobby Fischer

    Chess is war over the board. The object is to crush the opponent's mind.
    - Bobby Fischer
    “As you perhaps know, I haven't always been a Christian. I didn't go to religion to make me happy. I always knew a bottle of port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don't recommend Christianity.” -- C.S.Lewis

  9. #9
    Account Permanently Banned PHAT's Avatar
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    "Chess at its best it should be a distraction from feeding the ego but the ego usually eats the chess." - Sath

  10. #10
    CC International Master Kaitlin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Matthew Sweeney
    "Chess at its best it should be a distraction from feeding the ego but the ego usually eats the chess." - Sath
    when in doubt...c3
    .. this Caketin is full of little spiders and watermelon seeds.....

    ..Chess is all about fear and psychology

    ..Chess is like an exam..... you havent studied for

    ..If you're good at Chess it means you are very intelligent and could potentialy do great things
    ..... but that you might have wasted that playing way too much chess

  11. #11
    CC Grandmaster antichrist's Avatar
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    nobody has ever won a game by resigning. Tartakover.

    this clashes with KB's: one does not improve their position by resigning??

  12. #12
    Monster of the deep Kevin Bonham's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by antichrist
    nobody has ever won a game by resigning. Tartakover.

    this clashes with KB's: one does not improve their position by resigning??
    Not sure where you got that from that I had said that. On the resigning thread I said the quote was "No one ever won a game by resigning". Probably the quote was not originally in English so there are slight variations in translation (no one/nobody).

    I have had positions so bad they would certainly have been improved by resigning. Won from plenty of them too.

  13. #13
    CC Candidate Master
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    "when in doubt...c3"
    a3 you mean?
    or h3?
    a lot of people play c3 anyway.

  14. #14
    Account Permanently Banned PHAT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaitlin
    when in doubt...c3
    I C 1. But then again my eyes converge perfectly, when sober.

  15. #15
    CC FIDE Master Dozy's Avatar
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    Chess can be sweet or sour depending on which side of the table you are sitting at the time but you'll come out smiling if you remember the golden rule—do unto others before they do you!

    (Quoted from "Sweet & Sour Chess" http://www.rootyhillchess.org/sweetsour.html)
    Visit my chess blog: http://blog.chess.com/Dozy

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